It was a week after Rowen was born when I had my first bout of baby blues. The uncontrollable crying for no reason, irritability, lack of motivation and anxiety. I tried to hold it in…and keep it to myself, but by the end of the day I was just a wreck.
One day of baby blues was enough for me. It was enough for me to remember the days, months and years after my second pregnancy. And enough for me to realize I never want to go there again.
Baby blues is common with most recoveries because of the drastic change of hormones and lack of sleep. Postpartum depression is much more intense and long lasting. Even though I realized it was probably just hormonal changes and sleep deprivation, I decided to make changes immediately to avoid getting worse.
Get Dressed & Ready Every Day
I am the queen of wearing clothes that are comfy and cozy enough to be jammies. The biggest shelf in my closet is titled “Soft Pants” and categorized into three different sections – Leggings, Work out and Joggers. They are definitely my favorite articles of clothing, but also make me look and feel frumpy….especially postpartum.
Instead of reaching for my soft pants shelf every day, I am also rocking my maternity jeans. Something about being in jeans (even if they’re still maternity) or simply matching clothes makes me feel so much more put together.
Also, thank heavens for Maskcara. I joined Maskcara as an artist in August because it was beautiful, quality make up. And I will never go back because how simple, easy and quick it is. My make up is in my clutch. I keep it in my diaper bag and can whip it out in the carpool line, in the parking lot of the doc office and while I’m nursing. I can do a full face of make up including highlight and contour with one hand while nursing. And when I do, I feel 100 times better when running around like a mad woman.
Binge Watching the Right Media
Something about having a new baby and not getting enough sleep makes me want to sit on the couch and do absolutely nothing all day long. The less I do, the more I don’t want to do anything. After a few weeks of having no motivation and accomplishing nothing but snuggles at the end of the day, I decided I needed something to work towards and be motivated about every single day.
I wanted to binge watch a new Netflix series. I love a good Netflix binge. But I knew that if I went on a binge it would be harder to find motivation, and easier to escape reality. Instead of binge watching Netflix when my motivation is at an all-time low, I binge listen to podcasts, online workshops and self-development books. When I start my day with a few podcasts while I’m getting ready, I feel WAY more inspired. Plus, I can do it while I’m taking care of my family and on the endless car rides to preschool and doc appointments.
Lower the Expectations
Goodness, being a mom to three young kids is not easy. On top of being a mom, I’m a wife, a business owner x 2, house cleaner, laundry do-er, etc etc. All of us moms wear so many hats. I had to accept the fact that my house is going to be a mess more often, and laundry is going to pile up higher than ever.
I have to accept that my three year old will have crazy hair most days right now, and probably poop her pants in public on a regular basis. (So far its happened more times in the first few weeks of having a new baby than the last several months).I’m not a bad mom because of a messy house or whiny toddlers. My kids know I love them. I take care of them. I do my best around the house. And right now that is enough. The rest can wait till we’re back in our groove.
Self Care – Showers, Sleep & Food
What is self care when you’re a mom, right? Wrong! I let myself get put on back burner with my other two kids, which made life harder for everyone. I know that I need sleep and food to be happy and patient. This is a priority. Obviously sleep quality is a lot different with a newborn. I wake up a lot more often to take care of our baby which means I need to start going to bed much earlier. I am typically a night owl. There are nights I stay up to midnight or later, but with a new baby in my home, I start getting ready for bed at 8am. If we have a really bad night, I have to prioritize a nap even if it means getting a babysitter to come over. When my kids eat, I eat. After all, I’m still eating for two. Even if its a quick protein shake, I have made sure I don’t skip meals like I used to. And I shower so much more with a new baby because #fluids.
I also scheduled a foot zone, reiki session and Chiro appointment within the first month of having my baby which were major factors of having an easier pregnancy.
Talk About It
I didn’t tell a soul I was struggling after baby number two. My husband knew I was, but we didn’t talk about it until much much later. With this baby I’ve been very open about how I’m feeling. Because I was open, my husband can help me. He’s on my team and he helps me soo much even when I don’t ask for it. Tell someone how yo
u feel and what they can do to help you before you get to an irrational state of mind. For me it’s sleep, quality time and words of affirmation that I’m doing okay even when things are crazy.
It’s like the pain scale in the hospital. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling? What number would you like to stay under while you’re in the hospital? What medication are you interested in taking if you get above that number?
Get Out & Get Moving
Lastly, getting out of the house…or just off the couch is one of the best ways to lift my spirits. Sometimes being stuck inside doing the same thing day after day can be depressing. I get so stir crazy during the winter as it is, and so do the kids. So even if its just heading to Chic Fil A or going to my sisters house, getting out of the house is a MUST.
Thankfully, the baby blues only lasted a short time with this babe, but remember postpartum is different for every woman. Depression and anxiety can be so debilitating. Trust me, I’ve been there…for months and months. With Piper it took more than these things above to get back into my groove. I had to seek help from several different doctors and experts, and get my hormones balanced. If you’re constantly feeling blue, anxious or depressed after your pregnancy, seek help. It’s not worth it to wait!!!
PIN IT FOR LATER
Kylee started Kylee Ann Photography 9 years ago, and has since grown from a one woman amateur show to a full associate team. We shoot 50-75 weddings a year, and thrive on kindness and service. After a year of teaching Intro to Photography at the local technical college, she discovered that helping other entrepreneurs create thriving businesses is what fires her up! She hosts semi-annual Kylee Ann Sleepovers all over the US, speak at conferences and teach online courses about running a small business and marketing.
January 8, 2018
Kylee Maughan
