Pretty much everyone has gone through a hard time in 2020, you might even still be in the middle of your pandemic-inflicted trials. I don’t need to explain how tough this year has been but I want you to know that whatever your hard is, it matters!
Maybe your hard right now is that your husband doesn’t support your business or maybe you have toddlers who don’t sleep through the night. Or maybe just being burnt out or confused on where you should go next. Hard is hard.
Almost exactly a year ago I had some of the most painful trials of my life and I’m going to share with you what I learned about working through my hard times.
Sometimes our trials are debilitating and all we want to do is sit on the couch, watch TV and stay in the same place all day because our anxiety or grief is too much to handle. But guys, we have to keep going, the world keeps going. We can’t just stop. Please allow yourself space to heal but also know that there are things you can’t stop doing.
1. Focus on what’s in your control
When your world falls apart, nothing is in your control so you NEED to stop and focus on things you can control. I can control my house, my family, when I wake up in the morning, my diet, how I am as a mother. Identify what you have stewardship over and focus on that.
2. Unresolved anger turns into bitterness
Too often we don’t let ourselves feel our anger or our heartache, we bury it and become negative and resentful. We need to feel all the emotions, but we don’t want to stay in that. Get help to get the emotions out, it’s unhealthy to bury them. It’s okay to get therapy. For me, I like to brain dump all of my emotions – I put pen to paper and write out frustrations and fears. Then I just scribble it all away. I allow myself to feel all the reasons why I’m angry.
3. Don’t get sucked into negativity and bitterness
We can choose to stay in our negative emotions or we can choose to move on and replace it with more productive energy. I always follow up brain dumping with positive affirmations. Turn a negative into a positive, we can only control how we resolve things.
4. Start a gratitude journal
People really focus on gratitude around November but we need to keep the positive perspective EVERY DAY. You can be grateful for simple things and big huge things. It becomes easier to see your blessings when you begin identifying the smallest things. There’s always something to be grateful for even in your biggest trials.
5. Tighten your inner circle
Hard times make you recognize those people you wanted to call when you’re having your worst days, or who you wanted to trust with your feelings. You need to be supported by people who you trust, who love you and who are loyal. There might be some fake people in your life right now and rooting them out really helps you feel protected during your trials.
6. Move everyday!
Getting up and working takes your mind away from the pain. Do something that directs you in the next step, whether that’s physically or mentally. Move your mind, move your body. You don’t want to get stuck and be on your couch all day watching TV, get up! As we’re moving, eventually we will come out of that darkness but if we’re not moving, we’re stuck.
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Kylee started Kylee Ann Photography 9 years ago, and has since grown from a one woman amateur show to a full associate team. We shoot 50-75 weddings a year, and thrive on kindness and service. After a year of teaching Intro to Photography at the local technical college, she discovered that helping other entrepreneurs create thriving businesses is what fires her up! She hosts semi-annual Kylee Ann Sleepovers all over the US, speak at conferences and teach online courses about running a small business and marketing.
November 11, 2020