Today my sweet, sensitive, smart, amazing son is five years old! Last year for his fourth birthday, I made a blog post about his sensitive heart.

Brody has grown SO much with our new approach to parenting. It’s amazing how simply changing the way you parent for each personality type makes all the difference. Over the past few years, I’ve learned a few things about parenting a sensitive child that I want to share today in honor of his fifth birthday!

*Many thanks to The Child Whisperer & The Highly Sensitive Child.)

1. He needs Comfort, Reassurance & Validation

Brody is very emotional. He feels things deeply. Because of this, he needs comfort, reassurance and validation. In that order. Every time. Sometimes it can be exhausting, but if I skip a step in the process it makes for an even more emotional situation. Even something as simple as his shoes being too tight need recognition and validation.

We let him feel his feelings. We let him cry. We give him the space he needs to process. Then we can give him the comfort, reassurance and validation to work through every emotion and every situation. Since we’ve started doing that, he’s felt so validated and the crying spells happen way less often…except when he’s hangry. ;)

2. He needs Plans & Answers

Brody needs to be prepared. He loves plans, and needs me to talk him through each day before it happens. I have to give advanced notice to every single thing we do.

Plans make these sensitive kids feel safe and comfortable. When he starts new things, it’s very hard on all of us. He gets scared, cried a lot and gives up easily. Once he’s done it before he does amazing the next time! When he started soccer, preschool, boating, his first hike, skiing, etc…it all started the same way. Now that he’s in his second year of preschool and soccer, he hasn’t shed one tear. In fact, he would be so upset if we had to miss a day. He absolutely love it. He just needs to be prepared.

Brody also loves to know everything. He’s our little know it all. He asked a lot of questions, tells a lot of stories and needs examples or reasons for everything.

3. He needs Quiet Time & Quiet Spaces

Not only is Brody emotionally sensitive, but very sensitive to things around him…like noise. He does NOT like loud noises, and he also can’t be over stimulated. The opposite of his little sis. He needs lots of quiet and alone time. After a busy day or weekend, he needs his space. He loves to hang out with friends one on one, or do things with his parents, but constant big groups or team sports are exhausting. Type 2 kids need time to recoup, and relax.

When he doesn’t get his time during the day, he always makes sure he has it at night. Whether it’s an extra bedtime story, cuddling with dad or just having one of us sit in his bedroom to talk while he falls asleep.

4. He needs Equal Attention

Brody notices who is getting the most attention. This can be hard in our family because we have a wild little diva girl and a newborn on the way. Taking the time to listen to him, answer his many questions and just sit by him while he’s working on something is so valuable to him. Sensitive kids are very aware of the attention they get, and need to feel equally as loved.

5. He can’t be hurried

I had to start setting my alarm an hour before we had to leave the house so I could concentrate just on getting him started. When he is rushed, he gets slower. Type 2 children are soft, stead and easy going….and super slow. They do NOT like to be rushed. When Brody is rushed, everything is harder and more emotional. But when he is prepared and has time to get ready and do everything he wants to do, he is sooo easy.

6. He loves love and peace

Brody got a stuffed animal the other day and named it Lovey. Anytime we’re at a shop where they have signs, he gravitates towards the ones with the hearts. He loves love. And it matches his big giant heart. He hates fighting and yelling. Brody even created a song to sing when he and his sister get into a fight. “Lets not fight, let’s not fight.”

He makes sure everyone in our family knows he loves them every single day. He is the pacemaker in our family, and among all of his friends.

7. He loves a clean space

Brody does not like a mess. He cleans his room EVERY single night before he gets into bed. And he can’t go to sleep when Piper comes in and leaves something on his bedroom floor. He’s got systems and organization going on all over the place. He hangs his backpack on a hanger contraption he made in his closet, and brings his parade candy home to his candy chest immediately after every holiday.

8. He is the World’s Best Friend to Anyone

Best of all, he’s the world’s best friend. He loves everyone, and is so very thoughtful. When someone is being mean to Piper, he’ll defend Piper, but then he’ll befriend the bully. He can empathize with the sad, lonely and upset. He wants everyone to feel loved and included, and makes sure they feel connected to the group. He makes friends with anyone, and remembers friends forever. I love how he makes everyone feel comfortable, and is so sensitive to other people’s needs even if it means he sacrifices his own needs.

This is my favorite quality of our Brody boy. A heart as big as the moon.

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Kylee Maughan

Kylee started Kylee Ann Photography 9 years ago, and has since grown from a one woman amateur show to a full associate team. We shoot 50-75 weddings a year, and thrive on kindness and service. After a year of teaching Intro to Photography at the local technical college, she discovered that helping other entrepreneurs create thriving businesses is what fires her up! She hosts semi-annual Kylee Ann Sleepovers all over the US, speak at conferences and teach online courses about running a small business and marketing.

kyleeannphotography.com/kylee